As I sit here in a world which is spinning round and round, I realize the value of every moment that my eyes witness. It doesn’t take long for a change to take place & I’m sort of a person who’d rather have everything stay the way it is, in a particular manner, and not change. Talking about some specific cases here, to be precise.
Time to halt and a moment of silence. Guess, it’s just not rainbows and unicorns all the time, right? You find peace when you want to. It won’t just occur without a collaboration of your mind, soul, and body, all in all – every inch of your body. & that is exactly what I’m failing to find now a days.
I’d rather have myself stranded on a deserted island right now, to be far away some place different, some place alone, some place where I think from a free mind and have least bit of distractions and a stressful/tensed atmosphere. I’m not sad, neither is my life non-fulfilling, nor am I ungrateful.
Life is just too happening. & this is exactly how it’s going to be. I fear, maybe I don’t have enough time for myself. I fear, maybe I don’t give my loved ones proper attention. Conclusion being, Time is winning the marathon race and I’d be chasing it for a lifetime, but to no avail.
My sister would be getting married in a month, to be exact. There are ecstatic moments, impatient souls, annoying relatives, fulfilling preparations, bride’s pre-wedding mood swings and then there are the realization attacks. This leaves me, the person in question. Yes, she would be getting married and she would be gone. An end to a lifetime with the beginnings of a new one.
It wasn’t for the time when she left for university 5 years ago, that we actually interacted well. I had matured, she had realized.
Those 5 years went by in a blink of an eye, obviously. All in all, honestly, life had kept us so busy that the absence wasn’t felt much. She was missed but we had pretty much gotten used to it. She graduated, she came back. It was only for some while that she got a job and went back to the same city.
That’s when I thought, that this was merely a blessing in disguise. Since, it had been decided that she soon would be getting married; her getting married later and going away again to the same city (coincidence, much?) would just be a different situation, the other way around. Soon after, she left the job and decided to stay with the family and spend the last two months together, where she gets to throw her tantrums nowadays, and we get to bear them. Pffft.
Now when I think of the time, I know it would come and go. & we would merely be digesting it that, soon, without us noticing, we would have been adjusted to it already. So this is a blessing in disguise too? She’s here, we get to cherish more moments together. Just a bit harder to accept the change.
Everything happens for a reason. & change is what you have to accept rather than betraying yourself by staying in denial. Maybe, it’s the very ‘formal’ encounters I have had with her fiancé, who is a part of family now. Is that how it’s going to stay? Obviously, no. Or so I hope. Maybe it’s just my stubborn behavior that I want to keep things this way, I don’t want to grow and I want to stay this age.
But then again, by the end of the day, I understand. I realize & I get it. And somewhere, I’m excited. Sometimes, tomorrows are just not welcomed with much ecstasy but one always hopes for a better tomorrow deep inside, with more blessings to be showered upon all of us. Today is today; tomorrow comes more changes, more hurdles, more happening situations, and more happiness to be shared!
Cheers, to new beginnings. To a new tomorrow. Where one finds peace and happiness. Because, I believe it’s a blessing in disguise sent from beyond.
“This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, meanness,
Some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house
Empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out
For some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, these malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent as a guide from beyond”